How to Relax Your Mind When You’re Upset

Having a relaxed mind refers to a state of mental calmness and tranquility. It means that your thoughts and emotions are not overwhelmed by stress, anxiety, or tension. Pressure can put the body into “fight or flight” mode – an evolutionary tactic that releases hormones designed to get you ready to either fight or run from danger. In modern times, stress triggers these hormones but they’re not so helpful when the “danger” comes from giving a presentation at work rather than being faced with a wild animal. If you frequently find yourself feeling anxious, or panicked, your fight or flight mode is probably being triggered too easily and it is helpful to learn how to calm yourself down when you’re entering this state.

Stress is a normal part of modern life, but if you’re often faced with stressful situations and feel panicked or overwhelmed trying to deal with them, you may benefit from learning some coping strategies that can help you to stay calm.

Here are some tips for achieving and maintaining a relaxed mind when you’re upset:

  • Take a Deep Breath:

Breathing deeply and slowly triggers the body to stop releasing stress hormones and start to relax. Concentrating on your breathing can also help to distract your mind from whatever is bothering you so that you focus only on what is happening at that moment.

Breathe in deeply through your nose – you should breathe all the way into your belly and not just your chest. Hold for a moment and breathe out slowly through your mouth. Take a few minutes just to breathe and you should find yourself feeling calmer quickly.

  • Focus on the Positives:

Always imagining the worst case in every scenario is clinically known as catastrophic thinking and can increase anxiety and feelings of panic.

Rather than dwelling on negative aspects or outcomes, try to spend a few moments thinking positively. If your bathroom has flooded and you have to replace all the flooring, for example, this could be a very stressful situation. Yet try to focus on the fact that it gives you the opportunity to update and renovate, and the repairs should be covered by your insurance.

Staying positive allows your brain to avoid stress and stay calm.

  • Get Plenty of Sleep:

Everything seems worse when you’ve haven’t had a good night’s sleep. Stress and anxiety can often lead to insomnia so you end up in a vicious cycle – not being able to sleep and then feeling worse because you haven’t had enough sleep.

Make sleep a priority, especially if you’re under a lot of pressure. Go to bed early and ban electronic devices from the bedroom. Lavender essential oil can also promote feelings of calm and help you to sleep at night.

  • Meditation:

Regular meditation practice can help calm your mind, reduce stress, and promote relaxation. It involves focusing your attention on the present moment, often through deep breathing or guided visualization.

If you think meditation is all about sitting cross-legged for hours and chanting “om”, you couldn’t be further from the truth – even a few minutes of sitting quietly and concentrating on your breathing is a beneficial form of meditation.

  • Limit Stressors:

Identify sources of stress in your life and take steps to reduce or manage them. This could involve time management, setting boundaries, or seeking support from others.

  •  Surround yourself with positive people:

You probably have a few people in your life who can make you feel stressed just by being around them. While it’s not always possible to cut these people out of your life entirely, when you’re under pressure try to spend more time with friends and family who are helpful, positive, and will lift you up rather than drag you down.

  • Healthy Lifestyle:

Eating a balanced diet, getting enough sleep, and avoiding excessive caffeine or alcohol can all contribute to a more relaxed mind. Regular physical activity can reduce stress and improve your mood, contributing to a more relaxed state of mind. Exercise is just as important as sleep when it comes to keeping stress in check and dealing with external pressure.


Achieving a relaxed mind is a skill that takes practice. Different techniques work for different people, so it’s important to find what resonates with you and make it a part of your regular routine. Additionally, seeking professional help from a therapist or counselor can be beneficial if you’re struggling with chronic stress or anxiety.

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